New Cultural Experiences - my side trip to Japan

Don't let that innocent smile fool you.

New cultural experiences.   - my side trip to Japan

My original flight to Houston from Mumbai was canceled due to “mechanical problems”, yea, right.  What mechanical issues would be associated with a jet flying at 37,000 ft., in -60 degree F temperatures, over the ocean, for hours at a time?  But it was not my job to second guess some greasy mechanic, so I had to stay overnight in Mumbai and find a new route home.  The airline agreed to put me on a flight routed thru Tokyo, Japan, then on to Houston.  This schedule gave me a 6 hour layover in Tokyo. This meant two things:  On this trip I would circumnavigate the globe, (makes me feel like the explorer Magellan.  Of course he was killed by natives on his last trip) and I had the opportunity to make Japan number 31 on my list of countries that I have visited.

We landed mid - morning in at Narita Airport, near Tokyo.  I was feeling very good about my chances of figuring out how to actually leave the airport.  That is not as easy as you might think. You have to fill out paper work, have to know if you have time to get back before the flight leaves, and you have to buy local currency.   I did all that, and was ready to visit a new country and build new cultural experiences.

Since it is good to have a goal in life I told my wife, by text, that I was going to Tokyo to buy a cup of coffee.  I actually bought a large one at a Starbucks at the airport before I left for Tokyo, so I could drink it on the train.  But, I wanted to have another at a Tokyo coffee shop in order to absorb the local experience.  They also sold sandwiches that were not full of sushi, so I bought one with the coffee.  I was not hungry, but thought it would be the proper thing to do.  This coffee was better than the Starbucks I had at the airport, so I can conclude that Tokyo coffee is better than Narita coffee.  I guess it is a cultural thing.  I am very happy to have learned this and to broaden my experiences.

I walked around the city for about an hour, then decided it was time to head on back to the airport.  But, as I feared, I could not quite figure out how to use the remaining piece of paper that the ticket person gave me when I bought the round trip rail ticket. But I ignored that worry, followed the signs, found the track for the Express train going to Narita, and hopped on.  This was easy.

I found an open seat.  On the ride into Tokyo, I had an assigned seat.  This time, I did not.  Once the train started, it became apparent that it was not the Express Train, but one that was going to stop at each station between Tokyo and Narita airport.  As far as I knew, there were a 1000 stops and I would not make it back in time to catch my plane.  Or to see my children grow up.  But that is part of the excitement of dealing with new cultures and experiences.

A ticket lady came by and I showed her my ticket stuff.  She was telling me something that was apparently important, but I was not getting it.  Comedians always make fun of Brits for having bad teeth, but this poor girl’s teeth were so crooked, she could hardly talk.  I could not make out a thing she was saying.  Of course she was speaking Japanese, but if she’d had better dental care, I probably would have gotten what she was saying.

She kept pointing to her handheld device that had 1000 yen on the screen.  So I handed her a 1000 yen bill and she seemed happy.  I either tipped her for showing me her fancy hand held device, or I paid what was equal to $10 to learn about her dental challenges.  But that is OK.  It is all part of expanding one’s experiences.

Earlier, in Tokyo, I had stopped in a shop that sold hosiery and textile items.  I knew my wife would like some textile thing from here, so I went to the sales table, and started looking for something cheap.  (Thank goodness she does not read this).  I found some beautiful handmade socks.  (I include that description just in case she does read this)  They were huge by Japanese standards, so I thought they’d fit her. The prices was 1,160yen.  I guess that was not too bad.  I took them to the counter to pay.  The sales lady looked very concerned.  Her teeth were fine, but I still could not make out what she was saying, so she beckoned me to follow her back to the display.  She pointed to the sign and apparently the items were on sale six for 1,160 yen.  I told her I did not want to pick out five more, and just wanted the one.  I did not care if I paid for six if that was what the deal was, but she shook her head.  I guess the idea of ripping off an ignorant tourist, even a willing one, was not in her culture.  She would not sell me one, and I did not want to pick thru the pile to get five more.  So we parted friends.  Just one more expansion of my culture, although I came away empty handed.

The entire time I write this I am listening to the recordings over the train’s loud speaker system.  I think it keeps mentioning that this is the express service train to Narita, but the express part of this trip is what is not happening.  I think we have already stopped 10 times in 30 minutes.  I don’t have a clue if we are gonna start the express part or if we are going to keep stopping.  I now am beginning to regret not becoming a dentist after all.  I bet I could fix their teeth, then understand what these poor orally challenged people are trying to tell me.   I hope this is just part of expanding my worldly experiences.

Damn, we are stopping AGAIN!  And now I have to pee.  Too much coffee.  Regardless of how good it was, I am regretting that second cup.  If we don’t get to the airport soon, I am going to give a new cultural experience to all the other passengers that are on this train.  And they are just sitting here! Don’t they care that we are stopping at every crappy little station between Tokyo and Guadalcanal?  Didn’t we invade this country in WWII and win?  Why are they still speaking this Japanese crap?  What did our boys die for, anyway?  I am gonna go berserk soon if this damn train keeps stopping.

Oh Jeez!  Now we are not starting back up.  Dead stopped at a station.  Is this thing gonna keep going or what?  The tiny little voice on the loudspeaker (now there is some irony.  She can barely speak Engrish, and is whispering, but is being broadcast over a “loudspeaker”). Hmmph.  Just shut the hell up, lady, and get us to the airport.

Now she is telling us which terminal to get off at.  That is a good sign.  Maybe we will make it to the airport in THIS CENTURY! That little disembodied voice is saying something about needing to know what terminal your flight departs from.  Damn.  How am I supposed to know that?  Are these shrimpy little Japanese people all conspiring to make my life a living hell here in JAP LAND?  I am never drinking coffee again, especially in Tokyo!  We are just crawling along now and my bladder is about to explode.  I hope we are near the airport.  WOW! A very fast, EXPRESS TRAIN just blew past us, kicking sand in our face as it mocked our slow speed.  I am gonna kill something. I think I will start with that Berlitz Language teaching guy.  NO ONE needs to speak ANYTHING other than ENGRISH!

I hate doing new things for the first time!  Damn these new cultural experiences.