Songs from the 70’s

Songs from the 70’s
Or... the reunion that never was.

It has been 40 years since I graduated from High School.  I am sure some of you more skeptical readers are doubting that event could have occurred, but it is true.  So that means it is the year for my 40^th high school reunion.  

And while you are just sitting there, reading this, you might be pondering how could a man like me, who once was  full of such vim and vigor, have become such a decrepit old fart so soon?  I can’t understand it either.  One day, I am physically fit, energetic, and affable and the next thing I know I am a weak, grumpy old slug.  What the hell happened?  I have belatedly discovered that there is a very short time period in your life between when you are healthy enough to climb a mountain to not being able to tie your own shoe laces.  It is quite a come down, believe me. 

My brain quit working long before my lower back gave out. At least my back has an excuse since the discs are degenerating. But my brain?  Come on, it only has to sit up there on top of my neck, looking at the stuff that my eyeballs send in.  But, no.  My brain had to go and get all fuzzy and dumb and stuff.  And don’t even get me started on those eyeballs.  The vision thing was never very good for me for most of my life.  I was the kid who wore the thick, black rimmed spectacles.  Glasses were definitely not a fashion statement back then.  Later I went from contacts to Lasik surgery and experienced perfect vision for a few years.  But it was not a permanent cure.  My near sightedness came back with a vengeance.

Well, back to the high school reunion topic.  The Reunion Committee asked us to put together a list of songs from the 70’s that we remember and perhaps meant something special to us.  I submitted a list, but I am not really sure if I am remembering the titles and performers quite right.  Blame it on old fuzzy up there between my ears.  Since you, Gentle Readers, may not be familiar with these songs, I have added some information to help you place the tune:

• “I feel the earth move under my feet”, now used as the theme song in the TV show "Biggest Loser".
• “You are the wind beneath my sheets”.  Later adopted as the theme song of the Frijoles Aficionados and Recipe Traders Society. 
• "American Pi”  by the Circumferences
• “A Horse with No Name” sung by the Armour Meat Packing Company choir.
• “Da Ya Think I'm Sexy” by Rod Stewart (recently used as a campaign song by NY Mayoral Candidate Anthony Weiner).
• “Comfortably Numb” by Nova Kane.
•  “Can't You Hear Me Knocking?”  later used by the Life Alert Emergency Response, Inc
• “Bad Moon Rising” by the Flashers
• “Alone Again (Naturally)” sung by Dr. Neil Clark Warren of EHarmony.com.
•  “Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is”- performed by the Alzheimer Trio, or Quartet…I forget which.
• “Baby, What A Big Surprise”-  performed by Dick and the TransGenders

I lobbied hard for the disc jockey job so I could play my favorites at the reunion, but the committee told me that they checked, and according to school records, I didn’t even graduate from their class.  They suggested I find another graduation class to celebrate with.  Maybe in another state.  Hmmmm.  OK, be that way.  Now where did I put that song list?   

Author’s note:  Our high school class never did have that reunion.  Either there was not enough interest in seeing other former student’s wrinkles, or maybe none of us could remember why we were re-unionizing.  Anyway, in keeping with the memory loss of our class, I forgot to post this column last fall when I wrote it.  Sadly, some things don’t get better with age.